F. my Q.

What do you want now reader-ho?

If I have to answer all these damn questions I want a raise. What? I’m not even on a salary? Ohhh!

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What sort of things do you critique LoLo?

Well hot diggity DOG ain’t I glad you asked that! I mean, what if you sent me a car or something REALLY weird like that? No .. wait.. I’d agree to a car. Ok.. let me think…. DON’T send me cake. I hate cake. Too sweet. I wouldn’t say “no” to a lollipop.

ALRIGHT!! I’m trying to pay attention. I’ll review damn well ANYTHING. Better to find out what I won’t review and I’m guessing I won’t know that until you submit it. Listen carefully to this: it’s best to send a URL. That’s right. If it’s a pic, post it in Flickr, Picasso or one of the thousand other places to upload a pic. A video you say? LoLo Likes YouTube! Upload your stuff SOMEWHERE, send me the location of your U R frickin’ L.

The idea is to get YOU noticed. Isn’t that what it’s really ALL ABOUT? Then make sure you send the right thing. Do you want me to spend my valuable (and limited) time on your entire website, YouTube page, Facebook Fan page, gallery or blog? OR … do you have one particular post, pic or thing which gets my COMPLETE and UNDIVIDED attention?

I’ll review and critique anything you submit, the choice as to WHAT it is, is totally up to you. On WHAT do YOU want ME to spend time?

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Must I bribe you? My link is so special, I think you should list it for free.

By al-al-allllll MEANS send me your link. Will I blog it? ….Maybe.

Maybe not. We’ll just have to find out won’t we?

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WHY should I bribe you?

YOU GET a guaranteed link to your own website. ONE link from a blog multiplies your SEO. You GET THAT along with all my other visitors linking over to view what you got. If that’s not worth $5 to $20, then poop yer pants.

Show and tell baby, come on.. show your STUFF! Remember, I do like to mess with your mind, so please choose carefully.

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How much should I bribe you?

Can YOU believe you wrote that? Me either!!! ALL you CAN would be the answer now wouldn’t it? Ahhh.. alright, look .. I’ve give you a break. Karen’s chompin’ her bit, I’ll try to be more reeee-son-able.

Time is money. Let’s face it, part of the screwed-up-ed-ness of this world is that we’re so dependent on that green stuff. Time is money. I’m happy with $5.00 for 2 minutes of my time. JUST two minutes you say? Fine! Then ply me with more. Give me more, I’ll give YOU more… oh I LIKE that, don’t you?

So, figure it out. If you bribe me $20, I’ll be spending 8, count ‘em EIGHT minutes looking at whatever it is you send me. When you think you’ve got something worth spending eight minutes of my time on, what can I say, then BRIBE me twenty little ones.

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Whihiiihhhhhy all the “bad” language LoLo?

That’s very, very simple. It’s called freedom of expression. If I have to HOLD BACK to please every frickin’ body I just could not DO this. It’d be like asking an artist to paint using a brush with missing hairs… be like asking a concert pianist to perform using 2/3rd’s the keyboard. If you don’t like it, LEAVE.. give up the space to someone who can relate. We’re not all made of the same shit are we? Huh.

By the way, “huh” spelled backwards .. is.. “huh.” Food for thought. You’re welcome.